Here comes 2013… well, here it is…

It’s been a while since I’ve been here and for that I apologize, but I thought as it’s January 1, 2013, I would start again and decide to commit, despite the obstacles the universe will inevitably throw my way.  The past two years I have had quite a few obstacles.  Loss of my father and sister-in-law, my marriage, my job and my health… but even with all of this, I have gained much.  I was lucky to have both dad and KC in my life for as long as I did.  And although my marriage is over, the friendship my husband, David, and I have is stronger than ever, so really it’s just the restructuring of our relationship,which is wonderful, because we still care deeply for one another and are still each other’s biggest supporters. So as far as divorces go, ours is sad, but still amazing.  My job, well, it was just that, a job, although I did enjoy it and the people I worked with.  Typical issue, company got sold and new company was too far away, so I opted to look for new work, which is something I’m still doing and it turned out to be the best thing, because it turns out, other people needed me and I had I been working, I wouldn’t have been able to help them.  So, fingers crossed, I will find gainful employment in the next few months.  My health.  I have struggled with my weight for most of my life and it finally caught up to me in 2011, after I lost my dad and fell apart.  I was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes.  But I can buckle down when faced with a horrible thing (and was relieved to discover I did not have an enlarged heart – can’t make a heart shrink) and you can reverse Diabetes (especially Type 2) which I did, but my weight loss slowed and I once again have not endured to get healthy.  I’ve managed to keep the diabetes at bay, but I know I need to drop this excess baggage.

So, here I am and once again a new year begins and I’m asked about resolutions.  I’m not going to make them, but rather I’m going to pursue that which will propel me closer to my goals.  I need to set a schedule for my life.  Now, not so rigid I have no spontaneity, but rather a schedule to keep me from distractions and procrastinations.  A schedule to keep me honest and away from the TV.  A schedule to keep me writing and pursuing.  A schedule to keep me working on all that I’ve already achieved.  I no longer have only myself to write for, I have fans.  Now I have an obligation to them.  I have family and friends who depend on me, even though I know I need time for myself. I have to schedule my life to find balance.  But I feel in my soul that this is the time for me to find that.

The last two years were not only about obstacles and overcoming them, as well as seeing the positive in them, but it was also about discovering more about myself.  I have made new friends, who are so wonderful and supportive, and reconnected with friends I had lost touch with, and found that no time had passed at all.  I’ve jumped off the cliff and landed safely at the bottom.  I’ve discovered now… this year… it’s all about climbing back up… most likely so I can jump off again.  But I guess that’s what life is… it’s about taking chances and exposing yourself to the dangers and once you survive, it’s about the hard work, climbing back up, so you can do it all over again.  Yup, it’s all about that hard work, whether it’s writing or getting healthy or laughing when you’re sad or job hunting or just doing what needs to be done.  The hard work that when you’ve completed the journey makes you smile, no matter how tired or sore you are.  The hard work that you can take pride in.  So, I’d better settle in… I’ve got a long way to climb before 2014.